Novicefornow, 56

I am a 41 yr old who can no longer deny my fantasies. My desires have been occupying my every thought this past week. My thoughts and fantasies scare me while evokingthoughts. I am an EXTREMIST in all that I do. I am looking to first, learn and educate myself about b d s m and to of course, begin in the life style. I am hoping to get started with a local group very soon. I have the desire to be a submissive but I understand there are more submssives than dominants. I want to learn from those of you who have gone before me...